Posted on October 8, 2016

The customer support team would like to apologise for the extended absence of content. We are aware of the severe anguish and distress that it has caused many of our unfortunate readers, but there is sadly very little that we want to do about it.

In order to generate more interest and ad revenue, however, we shall modify our model somewhat. Advanced statistical methodology has revealed some important metrics about our core readers - almost all of them are just clever enough to not realise that they actually aren’t, enjoy reading articles which further inflate their inflated egos, and have internet access. In order to capitalise on their gullibility and other weaknesses, we shall be introducing a new format which is closer to other similar web-logs, and which has achieved a significantly increased number of self-assessed intelligence-digits.

The whole idea will be to expend less effort and give the appearence of a higher content production rate. In fact, it will all be pseudo-content and the vnord himself will feel inexcusably smug about this ingenious reformation. And the best part is that he can be completely open about it without anyone even caring.

So, without further ado, let’s present this vnord’s (vnordlist0) winners of vnord awards.

non-fiction of the vnordlist0:

The Black Swan

Yeah, you’ve probably already read it or heard about it. If you haven’t read it yet, it should be pretty near the top of your to-read list(s). If you’re not sure where to put it, put it right after Mein Kampf (copyright was recently lifted on that one, btw, so if you want to read the most critically annotated book to ever exist - more so than Dawkin’s personal KJV even - you’re in for a treat).

edgy web-log of the vnordlist0: is where it’s at. Derisivier and edgier than even, the only thing that is lacking is recursive self-parody. The only reason we have less pseuds in the comments section here at is that we have no comments section. Also we do not disclose our traffic stats. Does accelerationism work? Probably not, but it’s still fun.

above-average medicore french film of the vnordlist0:

Le Fabuleux Destin d’Amélie Poulain

We’re already going with non-hipster shit that you already know about (or will at least pretend to, if you want to keep up the pretense of being a proper pseud), so why the hell not. This one will let you lounge in front of your monitor (alone, of course, because “friends” are for the intellectually inferior), sipping your bordeaux, while you snigger at the puerile desires and shallowness of the plebes. ‘What is tragedy and beauty for them’, you laugh with a naturally aristocratic, heartless jeer, ‘is comedy for me’.

fiction of the vnordlist0:

Der Steppenwolf

If Amélie ranked as ‘beginner’ on your plebeograph, Der Steppenwolf would probably almost hit ‘journeyman’. So maybe you’ll enjoy it. You’ll have to look pretty hard to find a more memorable piece of fiction, and the prose is top notch. It shouldn’t disappoint you, even if you’re a pseud.

fun programming thing of the vnordlist0: - self-explanatory

That’s it for this week, or whatever time-unit will be observed between now and the next time a vnordlist is posted.